The best stance in relation to trans is that trans is not an identity.  It is a process, a task.  The person assigned the wrong gender at birth if male may be female or nonbinary.  Or if assigned female is male or nonbinary.  Their gender is their identity. 

An identity that is created regardless of others or without anybody else or independently is limited to how you see you.  This is very hard to do and will make your life very hard.  It will not seem real or to have any value unless it gives you a place in society.  You need to deal with those who say that an identity that is unrelated to what others think is not an identity at all but is only something in your head.  No reinvention or no discovery of an identity you did not know you had can happen without the social context.  You need others then to affirm your identity.  To be who you are you need to be connected to other people not necessarily all other people. Identity then is not for an island. Others need need to affirm who you are.  The problem with accept is that it implies, "Something is wrong here so I will just put that out of my mind."  Affirm is celebrating your identity.

Some say that if you dream up an identity to identify as you are degrading yourself by turning yourself into thoughts and feelings when you are so much more.  It makes you to blame for any bad thoughts or bad feelings and that is a huge thing to carry.  It makes you out to be a child abuser if you affirm a child who feels they are not the gender their bodies look like.  But who says that your sense of self is mere feelings?  There is more to it than that. 

So while we reject trans being an identity, we consider it the truth if a person is male or female or nonbinary.  They have a gender identity not a trans identity.

To tell a child they are born trans and not born in the wrong body or at least with the wrong parts and wrong physical prospects ignores how the child will hate body parts and hate their body in parts.  Trans is not an identity but a need.  Your inner self is male and that is your identity no matter what kind of body you are born with.  Your inner self is female and that is your identity no matter what kind of body you are born with.  Your inner self may be genderless and so on.